Thursday, May 31, 2007

The Parable of the Sockgod.

"And Sockgod said to the bunny bring me more followers, ‘Bah!’ And the bunny brought more followers."

Most of us know this great parable of the Black Vatican. For those of you who don't there is no explanation good enough to explain it, you just have to wait and ask us in person so we can show you the story. Sockgod progressed from just its small beginnings from being worshipped by the bunnies to having found true love in Sockgoddess, to having Sockbaby.

One of our new members of the Flock, Alter Grrrl, our Ambassador to the unholy Lands of California, brings us something new and exciting for the continuation of the story!
“Behold the legend of Sockbaby. Do you know where all of those socks go when you lose them in the laundry? They go to the Sockearth where the Sockpeople live. The Sockpeople are fallen, sinful bastards just like us and they need a savior too. Just as Jesus came to Earth as one of us, so he went to Sockearth as one of them. Through a strange cacophony of events, Sockbaby ends up in yet another world inhabited by demonic men in suits and good guys like Ronnie Cordova and Burger, and so the saga begins...”



Also it is another sad, sad day in the ministry for there might be a shortage on the Communal Drink of the Vatican. Yes you heard me right we might experience a shortage of tequila due to fucking capitalism. A lot of farmers are now burning agave fields to get ready to plant corn crops because a corn crop will yield more annual income for the farmers. I don’t blame the farmers, I understand they have to make a living and that is already hard enough without having a product that the price is at rock bottom levels. I understand that with corn they will have at least for a while a better means of living; I do however blame our capitalistic society that we live in.

“Capitalism is the Devil’s wet dream.” ~Ani DiFranco

3 comments:

Linus said...

It's fine investigative journalism like this that makes the Flock the best informed folk on the net. Well done, my wee apprentice!

Big Gay Jim said...

Go Squiddy! I had an email about the agave to corn transition waiting for me this morning. It's not enough that Shrub's stupid war is killing people, creating animosity towards America, and putting the crunch on our gas prices...now it's affecting our drinking! This is the last straw, and it's time for impeachment for sure! Thou shalt not come between the flock and their imbibation.

Anonymous said...

A little part of me just died...less tequila existing in the world...I die...die...die